June is my favorite month.
In grammar school, this was the month that summer BEGAN: when sprinklers and extended sleepovers became de rigueur, when the closest thing to homework was choosing between swing sets and hide-and-seek. As I grew up, June became the harbinger of all things bright and beautiful: long sunny days, nights full of humidity and starry farm fields. It was the time when students, released from the bondage of extra-curriculars and college pre-reqs, began to learn outside of the classroom, to understand the flow of untethered days, to explore the bursting green of nature that actively clamored for playtime.
I was always terrifically jealous of my friends with birthdays in June. To me, June was lovelier than any other month, a young, beautiful woman with purple flowers in her hair. June was romantic and wild and free, lifetimes distant from falling leaves and closed-door corridors smelling of glue and pencil shavings. June was who I wanted to be when I grew up.
She still is.
So in an effort to honor my love for June—to celebrate summer and the fact that today, June 1st, is one of my favorite days of the year—I am going to begin a 30-day effort to improve my life.
Haha, excuse me. See, this outburst is sort of what is inspiring me here. Life is great right now—it’s really, truly awesome—but I am very focused on the future, and as a result I am getting incredibly hung up on the tomorrows and yesterdays and failing to live in the glorious present. So rather than say I’m going to improve my life—which does set an awfully high goalpost, not to mention causing my neurotic inner banshee to wail and gnash her teeth at the impossibility of it all—let’s just say that I will choose to be present, actively still and mindful, for 15 minutes. Every day for 30 days.
A few things are inspiring me here. One: the fact that I can’t bear to live through another June that slips past my consciousness without full celebration of its greatness; two: the unflagging wisdom of Oprah magazine, which lately featured a woman who tried just this experiment; and three: fellow bloggers who successfully track and maintain daily commitments (to musical expression, or life-abroad learnings, or little black dresses, or the movie Julie & Julia, for reasons so masochistic I have yet to understand them).
So yes, I will be blogging more. Specifically, I will blog every day for 30 days. Including weekends. And holidays.
When it makes sense, I’ll be sure to let you know what comes to mind. You know, as I’m sitting there, not thinking, for 15 minutes. Grappling with my brain’s never-ending desire to jump 40 steps into the future. I’ll beat my flighty cerebral tendencies into submission, let go and just BE. HERE. NOW.
I’m past the point of summer vacations, but June still has lessons to teach me. Flash of fireflies and heat lightning, mown grass and the smell of rain: these moments are eternal; these minutes are unchanged. Perhaps in the silence of my thoughts, I’ll feel nervous. I might be lonely, or jealous—or joyful. But no matter what, I will be present, sitting with my hands and heart fully immersed in the moment. I will remember, as June reminds me, that this instant is the only one we ever have.