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How to Make a Deck of Love

Hey, remember Valentine’s Day?
It was this holiday, like, a week ago? I’m pretty sure it made 75% of America feel terrible?
I was one of the lucky few that really enjoyed her Tuesday. Not to brag, but I probably ate more chocolate in 24 hours than most of you eat in a month. I’ve just got it like that.
Anyway, Boyfriend was not one of the lucky ones. Since I wasn’t sure we’d even be celebrating, I waited until the last minute (i.e. after I’d received a present on Valentine’s Day itself) to get him something. The good news is that I already had a gift in mind, something I had seen on Pinterest. It looked cute and easy and like there was potential to futz around on PowerPoint. Hooray!
I had a lot of fun making this gift and took pictures along the way. Please note that if you want to make one yourself and need specific guidelines to do so, other bloggers have done a much better job than I have. I think Papervine’s finished product is especially lovely, and she gives all the details here.
Papervine’s Mini Love Book
So here we go with my version of this idea:
Deck of Love Tutorial
1. Get a deck of cards (duh). I found these adorkable ones at a thrift store. I think of them as a celebration of the fact that Boyfriend and I are incredibly nerdy.
You could also use standard playing cards. Maybe you already have one spare set lying around your house (or twelve, if you’ve got some sort of problem).
2. Punch holes in your cards. I failed to use a ruler and just eyeballed the first one with my hand punch. Even though I used each card as a model for the next, the spacing was pretty inconsistent. In other words, don’t be as lazy as I am.
I put my punched cards onto binder rings. You can imagine the satisfaction when I snapped those babies closed.
Side note: punching holes takes a lot of time. And energy. And wrist strength. I’d imagined that I could finish this project in about two hours, which now seems laughable as I spent at least that much time punching holes. The good news is that you can do it anywhere, including play rehearsal or sitting on the front stoop on a sunny day. Stoopin’ with paper crafts.

Having one of these on hand will both skyrocket the cute factor and decimate productivity.
3. Make labels and glue them onto the cards.
Again, this part took longer than I thought it would. Sometimes I think the entirety of my adult existence centers on my need to realize that everything takes longer than I estimate. Including this blog post. Augh.
So I made labels in PowerPoint. This time I used a ruler, but I still had to adjust it a few times. I chose the font and the color to reflect The Science Fiction Book Club theme, not the usual red and black business. Then I cut out the squares and glued them on with a glue stick. For one blissful hour I felt like a kindergartener again.
4. Clip those binder rings closed!

All done. I think my favorite part was brainstorming the fifty-two things I love about Boyfriend. Happily, my attempts at humor did not go unnoticed, and even though he got it almost a week late I think he liked it. (Of course I gave it to him at the end of the day, when his alternatives were express delight or sleep alone.)
One last thing: while brainstorming my reasons for love, I felt awash with warm and fuzzies. This leads me to believe that ruminating on the virtues of our loved ones, no matter what the occasion, is a great way to rejuvenate gratitude, a practice so healthy it might even compensate for all the chocolate.
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The Grapes of Wreath

Today is my sister’s birthday, so yesterday I surprised her: I left Charlottesville at the crack of dawn and drove six hours to the Dunkin Donuts where she works.

Her reaction was basically this, at which point I collapsed on the counter and had an emergency Dunkin Turbo shot directly into my veins.


Later we took a walk through my hometown and admired the wintery landscape, the lacy tree limbs and frosty porch lights and drunken Giants fans falling into the snow. Despite these simple pleasures, a thought kept tugging on the back of my mind:

TAKE DOWN YOUR CHRISTMAS DECORATIONS, PEOPLE!

Now, I realize 95% of suburbanites follow basic human protocol and remove their sh*t by January 1st. It can be sad, taking down the pretty bows and bells and heirloom ornaments; it can be downright depressing, tossing that poor, used-up tree into the street. But if you or your loved ones have trouble letting go—or just want some festivity back in your life—Doctor Derby has your fix.


Make a wreath!


Yes, the solution is a ring of stuff hung from your front door. Nix the pine and ditch the orbs; there are a bazillion different ways you can celebrate the season—like, every season OTHER than Christmas.


Make it happy:

From blog.tiffanyzajas.com
Or hopeful:
From centsationalgirl.com
Or pretentious:
From hgtv.com
Just make it appealing to youI would kill to mush around a neighborhood spotted with personalized dashes of color; it would help me feel like I knew my fellow townspeople.
Can’t you just imagine the difference between these people?

Person A: 

From thepaintedhive.blogspot.com

Person B:

From kk.org
Clearly A is a farmer and B is a toddler. Nice neighborhood!


Seriously, I can’t overstate how easy it is to make a wreath.  (You can also make it super-complicated, in which case you should read someone else’s blog.) Here is my three-step guide to wreathing:

                
                   1. Go to the Dollar Store and buy what appeals to you.
                   2. Go to a craft store and buy a glue gun and a foam ring. (You could also bend a wire 
                        hanger into a circle.)
                   3. Arrange your frou-frou and glue it in place. Don’t forget to attach a loop or hook to 
                         hang that baby.
That’s it! So easy, so much fun.

 I’m speaking from personal experience here. I decided to make a Valentine’s wreath last week, and look at how perfect it (I) is (am):

Bedford Falls, here we come!

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Free Clinic Fridays: Vintage Surf Photos, Mosaic Art Project and My Eyebrows

Happy Friday!

I recently noticed a trend that you bloggers “in the know” probably recognized circa 1999. Referred to as weekly wrap-ups, Friday obsessions, or bits and pieces, these posts are just lists of other blogs, websites, or real-time hashtags that interest the writer. 

Genuis! my brain squealed. A way to validate my countless hours of interweb trolling!

Yes, dear reader, I have decided to establish Free Clinic Fridays (a title to further emphasize my unjustified medical claims). Think of it as a weekly shortlist of cures. There’s bound to be relief for something that ails you.

So without further ado, I present my first: 
Free Clinic Friday
What do you need to do?

LAUGH: Wannabe Hipster Shoes 
(The Lawrence/Julie/Julia Project)
I’ve been holding out on this one. If you didn’t already know, Lawrence is a college kid who sits in his dorm room and watches the movie Julie and Julia every day. Like, every single day for a year, and today is the 333rd day. The best part? He doesn’t even like the movie. His blistering hatred for Julie Powell is one of the funniest things Northwestern University has ever produced.

PANIC: Halloween Makeup

Guess what, kids? Halloween is almost here, and in addition to sugar highs and binge drinking, you’re probably donning a costume. If you are the type of person who bothers to dress up, you had better go all-out. If you aren’t, shame on you.
This year, Boyfriend and I are going as Boris and Natasha, the dastardly no-goodniks from my favorite childhood VHS, Rocky & Bullwinkle. I can’t wait to butcher a Russian accent, but I’m a bit nervous about the makeup part:

Check out her eyebrows!

Actually, drawing the curvy lines will be easy, but covering my real eyebrows will be a bit more unnerving. Did you know that the best method for concealing forehead caterpillars is Elmer’s?
Apparently I’m supposed to rub glue sticks on my forehead and pray I don’t wind up hairless. No joke. Even drag queens approve.
Depending on how it goes, I will post some pictures of us in costume next week. In the meantime, here is a photo of my current brows (in case we never meet again). I’m sentimental already.

ESCAPE: Vintage Surf Photos
Hurricane season is beginning to wane, and that represents a last hurrah for some surf buffs. Though I no longer live beside the ocean, I still close my eyes and pretend sometimes. Thanks to the ever-hilarious Orlando Soria for these photos.



IMAGINE: Mosaic Art Project
I made this!
My family came to visit this week, and being a crafty bunch of women we undertook a number of projects. My favorite was this one, developed and described in detail at the delightful blog Salvage Savvy. It’s actually really easy to make artwork like this for your home in whatever colors and textures you choose. Check out the how-to to get crafting!

OM: Sliding Down (Instrumental)
Last summer I saw a thrilling trio in concert: Zakir Hussain, Bela Fleck & Edgar Meyer.
I was especially captivated by Edgar Meyer, a American bassist and composer whose fingers moved so fast they became a blur. (That being said, Bela Fleck and Zakir Hussain were equally mind-blowing!) Here, Meyer comes together with Fleck once more, teaming this time with Mike Marshall in the song Sliding Down. Let this piece of aural poetry move you, lay its masterful hands on your spirit, and I promise you’ll sink into the weekend imbued with peace.

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